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LWTK: where do you draw the line?

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  • LWTK: where do you draw the line?

    Few recent events have left me wondering where people draw the line on a particular issue.. I'm usually quite lenient, "uncaring" if you will, about what a lady friend I'm with is doing. I figure if someones unhappy, they'll leave you/run off with someone regardless of how you act, and you'll make yourself look like an uncomfortable cock if you try and act on it/stop it anyway. Roll with it.

    So anyway my question is, where do you draw the line with guys talking to your girl? I pretty much let things happen, unless asked to intervene/step in for some reason. My best mate is the same, to the point where his girlfriend gets angry that he doesn't seem to "care" about what shes doing. Some other friends I know get quite protective.

    So anyway, my question: How far is too far with your girl interacting with other guys? Do you ever feel yourself tested?

    P.S. sorry for the taylor-esque post.

  • #2
    P.S. Sorry ladies, the same applies in reverse too (if you're uncomfortable with your fella hanging out with lady folk). I mainly targetted it at guys as PSB is by my calculations a 90/10 weinerfest ratio.

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    • #3
      Originally posted by lee View Post
      to the point where his girlfriend gets angry that he doesn't seem to "care" about what shes doing
      I am the same, I guess because I trust her not to fuck around. If I didn't trust her, I wouldn't be in a relationship with her.

      While it's good to know they care, it sucks to have them get too protective and worried. This happened with my last gf, and it really hurt that she actually didn't trust me with a particular female friend.

      I'm sure that being as trusting as I am means I could have the wool pulled over my eyes, but I guess you have to have been burned before you lose that...

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      • #4
        so what of the poor chaps that have been burned....?
        Have you won the game recently?? Post here


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        • #5
          Don't know yet...

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          • #6
            I'm fine with a guy I'm with talking with or gives hugs to other women (friendly hugs, not sexy ones :p ). It's when they're wanting to spend heaps of one-on-one time with another lady, as in, a similar amount of time that they spend with me, that I may start to worry.

            And the only reason I do worry, is that I've been cheated on several times in the past and it really hurts. I try not to let past relationships cloud my judgement of any new men I date though, but it's hard when experience has taught you otherwise.

            And it's not because I don't trust the guy I'm with usually either, it's generally because I don't trust strange women (I trust ones I know, that could be my downfall one day I guess). Unfortuantely, women and men don't seem to care nowadays if they're hitting on someone who is spoken for... that's a generalisation, but I see that a lot out there.

            Ok, end of novel
            R Legal and loving it

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            • #7
              A life time ago I stuffed some poor schmuck into a rubbish bin in Garden City for staring too long at my girlfriend's cleavage.

              I'm better now though.

              What is best in life? Troll the forums, see the threads derailed before you and hear the lamentations of the moderators.

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              • #8
                I'll happily let it go until she starts looking uncomfortable. If the hairs start going up on my back I'll mention it later on.
                "Once upon a time we would obey in public, but in private we would be cynical; today, we announce cynicism, but in private we obey."

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                • #9
                  I couldn't care less. She'll either signal for backup, or piss off with the other guy. Each choice validates the response/dismissal from me anyway.

                  P.S. Thanks for the mention.
                  This is general advice only and does not take into account your individual objectives, financial situation or needs (your personal circumstances). Before using this advice to decide whether to purchase a product you should consider how appropriate it is in regard to your personal circumstances.

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                  • #10
                    Well... having a friendly conversation or giving a friendly hug to a girl is fine with me, we've been together long enough to trust each other now but the line is drawn when she starts getting all into a "flirty hoe" mode, plays with her hair etc, that's when I start getting a little bit uncomfortable. I know there's currently this girl at his local coffee shop who gets all silly and giggly when he's around and I think its pretty funny/cute that women find him as attractive as I do and as I said, I know he's not going to react on it so *shrugs*
                    In the cherry blossom's shade
                    There's no such thing
                    as a stranger.

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Kali View Post
                      I'm fine with a guy I'm with talking with or gives hugs to other women (friendly hugs, not sexy ones :p ). It's when they're wanting to spend heaps of one-on-one time with another lady, as in, a similar amount of time that they spend with me, that I may start to worry.

                      And the only reason I do worry, is that I've been cheated on several times in the past and it really hurts. I try not to let past relationships cloud my judgement of any new men I date though, but it's hard when experience has taught you otherwise.

                      And it's not because I don't trust the guy I'm with usually either, it's generally because I don't trust strange women (I trust ones I know, that could be my downfall one day I guess). Unfortuantely, women and men don't seem to care nowadays if they're hitting on someone who is spoken for... that's a generalisation, but I see that a lot out there.

                      Ok, end of novel
                      Is it really a time thing tho? What about opposite sex co-workers? Chances are, your other half spends more time there with members of the opposite sex than he does with you.

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                      • #12
                        yeah that's true, I spend more time with my co-workers then I do with the rest of my family! sad but true
                        In the cherry blossom's shade
                        There's no such thing
                        as a stranger.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by porcelain View Post
                          yeah that's true, I spend more time with my co-workers then I do with the rest of my family! sad but true
                          It doesn't help when you do 40 odd hours of work in the week and maybe even weekends with other people and then you're only home for dinner and beddy byes with your partner, family and pets.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Kali View Post
                            Unfortuantely, women and men don't seem to care nowadays if they're hitting on someone who is spoken for... that's a generalisation, but I see that a lot out there.
                            +1 agree with this.

                            There is talking, then there is taking it too far and the losers who don't get the "Piss of, am taken" or the "do you need me to get someone to forceably remove you?" and keep trying, need to learn a thing or two. It isn't cool, in fact it can be quite disturbing.

                            (Like that guy at the Saint a few weeks ago who insisted on buying drinks, when my friend and I said no, we had even given the barman our money, the guy leaned over, grabbed the money back and said "it's my buy!", we had told him we were taken and weren't interested, had never even met the guy. The barman should have helped us out there I think. Oh well, Taz got a free drink from it!!)

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                            • #15
                              I don't really care what my partner does as I agree with above, where if they cheat on me it is just delaying the inevitable if I say something or step in. Trust and equality are the two biggest things I think that relationships are built on. A couple of my ex's have been promotional models, so you ahve to get used to people talking to them and gorking at them a lot, most of mates couldn't see how I handled it. They can do what they like, as long as they go home withe me and don't cheat on me, the relationship will last another day.

                              Equality though seems to be something that I find hard to get. Sure it is fine for them to talk/flirt/whatever with other guys, but if another girl talks to me, it is on. I usually couldn't care less if a girl flirts with me (most of the time when I am in a relationship, I don't even notice and got told about it later) or whatever, but I would hope that the respect is mutual. The amount of times my ex's have run up when I start talking to another girl is rediculous, but it is fine for them to flirt, accept drinks, dance etc with as many guys as they please.

                              Another thing that gets me is when my girlfriend does flirt with other guys, then when it goes too far they blame it on me. I mean really, if you take it too far, then have the guts to admit and ask for help, not get in further trouble, then blame it on me for not running to your assistance or keeping a permanent eye on you. If you want my help, stay near me, I am not following you around like a lost puppy.

                              Current girlfriend is in America at the moment, so I have no idea what she is up to, that has it's positives, but I think that a less trusting soul or anyone synical/sceptical would find it hard to stop the mind from racing.
                              [Y]

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