Today's Dad Joke

[Hillz]

this isn't a joke it actually happened today lol

my old man was getting some parts for a few of his old VMX racers "these will all be yours one day" he says... Yeah & i'll sell half of them & get a ducati

[okitoki]

Police are looking for a man selling cheap velcro....apparently its a rip off.

Police are warning people to stay away from a suspicious person selling illegal glues... they dont want you to be stuck in a sticky situation.

[bigsikkle]

why do boxers never have sex the night before a fight ?
its because they don't fancy each other .

[bigsikkle]

made love to a girl with one leg last week .
might use my dick next time .

[TurboR1]

At a parent - teacher meeting;

Teacher: Young Timmy is very quiet and reserved.
Mother: Haha, he gets that from me.
Teacher: It's often a sign of sexual abuse.
Father: haha, he gets that from me.

[BusaSteve]

Archbishop Pells favourite sport?

Boxing....loves watching poundings in a ring

[datsikk]

How do you make a tissue dance?


Give it a little boogie.

[bigsikkle]

sent the missus down to bunnings for some thinner .
she came back still fat .

[bigsikkle]

two dicks walking into a gay bar .
one says to the other , "lets get shitfaced"

[FJ Steve]