Little Johnny!

[Wrex]

Little Johnny's next door neighbour had a baby.
Unfortunately, the little baby was born with no ears. When they
arrived home from the hospital, the parents invited Little Johnny's family
to come over and see their new baby.
Little Johnny's parents were very afraid their son would have a
wise crack to say about the baby. So, Little Johnny's dad had a long
talk with Little Johnny before going to the neighbours.
He said, "Now, son...that poor baby was born without any ears. I
want you to be on your best behaviour and not say one word about his
ears, or I'm really going to belt your arse when we get back home."
"I promise not to mention his ears at all," said Little Johnny. At
the neighbour's home, Little Johnny leaned over the crib and touched
the baby's hand. He looked at it's mother and said, "Oh, what a
beautiful little baby!"
The mother, who had braced herself for Johnny's comment, was
pleasantly surprised and said, "Thank you very much, Little Johnny."
Little Johnny continued, "This baby has perfect little hands and
perfect little feet. Why, just look at his pretty little eyes! Did
his doctor say he can see good?"
The mother a bit bewildered, hesitantly replies "Why, yes... his
doctor said he has 20/20 vision"
Little Johnny said, "Well, it's a good thing, cause he'd be fucked
if he needed to wear glasses"


Please don't whore this thread just add your little johnny jokes to it see how many we can get

[Soph]

Okay here's one

Little Johnny is much older now and goes to high school. He also has a new girlfriend and tell's his dad all about her.
The next day just before school finishes his dad decides to go and check this girl out. He sees johnny and his girlfriend and thinks to himself 'Not bad, not bad at all.
When the dad is walking home by himself, he takes a shortcut and sees a big tree and decides to have a rest in the tree.
A bit later on, johnny and his girlfriend come along and sit underneath the tree. After a while they start kissing, playing and then they start going for it.
After a good half an hour johnny looks up into the sky and says 'Father, Father up above, give me strength for one last shove' Than the dad in the tree replies 'Son, Son down below, get off and give your old man a go'.