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An oldie for you Ozzies

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  • An oldie for you Ozzies

    An Australian, an Irishman and an Englishman were sitting in a bar.
    There was only one other person in the bar; a man. The three men kept
    looking at this other man, for he seemed terribly familiar. They
    stared and stared, wondering where they had seen him before, when suddenly the Irishman cried out, "My God, I know who that man is. It's Jesus!"
    The others looked again and, sure enough, it was Jesus himself,
    sitting alone at a table.

    The Irishman call out, "Hey you!!! Are you Jesus?"
    The man looks over at him, smiles a small smile and nods his head.
    "Yes, I am Jesus" he says.
    The Irishman calls the bartender over and says to him "I'd like you
    to give Jesus over there a pint of Guinness from me." So the bartender
    pours Jesus a Guinness and takes it over to his table.
    Jesus looks over, raises his glass, smiles thank you and drinks.

    The Englishman then calls out, "Errr, excuse me Sir, but would you be
    Jesus?" Jesus smiles and says, "Yes, I am Jesus." The Englishman
    beckons the bartender and tells him to send over a pint of Newcastle
    Brown Ale for Jesus, which the bartender duly does. As before, Jesus accepts the drink and smiles over at the men.

    Then the Australian calls out, "Oi, you! D'ya reckon you're Jesus, or
    what?" Jesus nods and says, "Yes, I am Jesus." The Australian is
    mighty impressed and has the bartender send over a pot of Victoria
    Bitter for Jesus, which he accepts with pleasure.

    Some time later, after finishing the drinks, Jesus leaves his seat
    and approaches the three men. He reaches for the hand of the Irishman and shakes it, thanking him for the Guinness. When he lets go, the
    Irishman gives a cry of amazement.

    "Oh God, the arthritis is gone," he says. "The arthritis I've had for
    years is gone. It's a miracle!"

    Jesus then shakes the hand of the Englishman, thanking him for the
    Newcastle Brown Ale. Upon letting go, the Englishman's eyes widen in

    "By jove", he exclaims, " The migraine I've had for over 40 years
    is completely gone. It's a Miracle!"

    Jesus then approaches the Australian, who has a terrified look on his

    The Aussie whispers ... "F*** off mate, I'm on Workers Comp"

  • #2
    LOL - Now that's fuckin funny!


    • #3
      haha thats classic ... typical aussie


      • #4
        pure gold


        • #5