Due to increasing products liability litigation,
American liquor
manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion the
following warning
labels be placed immediately on all varieties of
alcohol containers:
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you
wondering what the
hell
happened to your bra and panties.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think
you are
whispering
when you are not.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor
in dancing like a
retard.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to
tell your friends
over
and over again you love them.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to
think you can
sing.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to
believe ex-lovers
are
really dying for you to telephone them at four in the
morning.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think
you can
logically
converse with members of the opposite sex without
spitting.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading
cause of
inexplicable
rug burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the
illusion you are
tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most
people.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to
think people are
laughing with you.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause
pregnancy.
WARNING: the konsumshun of alcahol may Mack you tink
you can tipe reel
gude.
"Life isn't like a box of chocolates, it's more like a
jar of
jalapenos.
What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow."
American liquor
manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion the
following warning
labels be placed immediately on all varieties of
alcohol containers:
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you
wondering what the
hell
happened to your bra and panties.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think
you are
whispering
when you are not.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor
in dancing like a
retard.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to
tell your friends
over
and over again you love them.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to
think you can
sing.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to
believe ex-lovers
are
really dying for you to telephone them at four in the
morning.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think
you can
logically
converse with members of the opposite sex without
spitting.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading
cause of
inexplicable
rug burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the
illusion you are
tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most
people.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to
think people are
laughing with you.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause
pregnancy.
WARNING: the konsumshun of alcahol may Mack you tink
you can tipe reel
gude.
"Life isn't like a box of chocolates, it's more like a
jar of
jalapenos.
What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow."
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