> These are from a book called Disorder in the Court, and are things
> people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters - who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
>
> =================================
>
> Lawyer : Are you sexually active?
>
>
> Witness : No, I just lie there.
>
> =================================
>
> Lawyer : What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
>
>
> Witness : He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
>
>
> Lawyer : And why did that upset you?
>
>
> Witness : My name is Susan.
>
> =================================
>
> Lawyer : What is your date of birth?
>
>
> Witness : July fifteenth.
>
>
> Lawyer : What year?
>
>
> Witness : Every year.
>
> ======================================
>
> Lawyer : What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
>
> Witness : Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
>
> ======================================
>
> Lawyer : This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
>
>
> Witness : Yes.
>
> Lawyer : And in what ways does it affect your memory?
>
> Witness : I forget.
>
>
> Lawyer : You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?
>
> ========================================
>
> Lawyer : How old is your son, the one living with you?
>
> Witness : Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
>
> Lawyer : How long has he lived with you?
>
> Witness : Forty-five years.
>
> ========================================
>
> Lawyer : Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his
> sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
>
> ===========================================
>
> Lawyer : So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
>
>
> Witness : Yes.
> 8)
> Lawyer : And what were you doing at that time?
>
>
> ===========================================
>
> Lawyer : How was your first marriage terminated?
>
>
> Witness : By death.
>
>
> Lawyer : And by whose death was it terminated?
>
> ===========================================
>
> Lawyer : Can you describe the individual?
>
>
> Witness : He was about medium height and had a beard.
>
> Lawyer : Was this a male, or a female?
>
> ===========================================
>
> Lawyer : Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
>
> Witness : All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
>
> ===========================================
>
> Lawyer : All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
>
> Witness : Oral.
>
> ==============================================
>
> Lawyer : Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
>
> Witness : The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
>
> Lawyer : And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
>
> Witness : No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
>
> ================================================
>
> Lawyer : Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
>
> Witness : No.
>
>
> Lawyer : Did you check for blood pressure?
>
>
> Witness : No.
>
>
> Lawyer : Did you check for breathing?
>
>
> Witness : No.
>
>
> Lawyer : So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began
> the autopsy?
>
>
> Witness : No.
>
>
> Lawyer : How can you be so sure, Doctor?
>
>
> Witness : Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
>
>
> Lawyer : But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
>
>
> Witness : Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing
> law somewhere.