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Ranting, but is it any use?

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  • Ranting, but is it any use?

    Hi all - I'm sending the following rant to Melville council and my local "member" (gotta love that name). Any suggestions/comments?

    I am writing to you concerned about the number of dangerous obstacles being permanently erected on roads in Melville. I refer to the burgeoning number of concrete and brick median strips, sprouting trees, which seem currently in vogue. Although I can appreciate how some sections of the community may view these artefacts as elements of suburban gentrification, in my opinion the primary purpose of our local road transport system is being compromised by a design initiative which appears to favour form over function. Further, we appear to be putting young lives at risk by placing unnecessary obstacles in the path of inexperienced users of our local roads.

    I recently spent two years overseas and I was shocked upon my return to Melville to see the proliferation of these hazards. In many countries around the world roads are designed to be clear such that traffic may flow unimpeded. In Melville we seem determined to challenge, maim and kill inexperienced drivers and motorcycle riders.

    I have several concerns over these hazards. Firstly the rapid and unrestrained growth of plants on the median strip obscures oncoming traffic. Recently outside my home just off Karel Avenue in Leeming a motorcyclist and a passenger in a car were killed when the car driver was unable to see the oncoming traffic due to the obscuring of the road by median strip foliage. This is not the only such accident to occur in similar circumstances on this road. Residents are taking these matters into their own hands by regularly chopping down obscuring foliage, surely an indication of their misplacement in the line of sight of traffic.

    About 6:45am on the 14th of June 2006 an inexperienced driver lost control cornering from South Street and moving south down Karel avenue. He was struggling to regain control when he “bounced” off the median strip and into our backyard, missing my son by less than a metre as he lay sleeping in his bed.

    These accidents, and many more like them, may have been prevented, or the consequences reduced, were it not for the proliferation of chunky hazards, and trees, which are being permanently affixed to the middle of local roads, such as Karel Avenue, in Melville.

    Secondly, as a motorcyclist myself I am concerned that a young rider, running wide into a road such as Gracechurch Crescent, would have no “run off” should they make such a common rookie mistake, and subsequently run into one of the many obstructions recently placed in the middle of the road that now plague this thoroughfare. Whilst a car driver might suffer only minor injuries in such an accident, a motorcyclist in these circumstances runs a very high risk of serious injury or death.

    I cannot see the point of deliberately placing hazards in the paths of inexperienced drivers. We know that they will make mistakes, but why do we need to make the consequences of their "lessons" so dire? A moment of inattention leading to common lane wandering of a car or motorcycle should not be punished with injury, maiming, disfigurement or even death.

    Finally, at what cost are these hazards being impressed upon us? If it is a matter of road safety, then the money would be better spent on driver education and training – a known method of improving safety on the roads. I have no complaints regarding well signposted speed humps to control the speed of traffic on local suburban roads, but median obstructions to the safe viewing and flow of traffic are clearly dangerous, and in my opinion should be illegal.

    If it is purely a matter of urban design, then I put it to you that the proliferation of these hazards are at best an oversight, and at worst demonstrate a cruel and callous disregard for the road users in our suburbs.

  • #2
    1. Capitalise "avenue"
    2. Tell them what you want
    Originally posted by Melkor
    The Saint is all over the answer like a Saint on a cupcake.


    • #3
      I want them to stop cluttering up the roads with dangerous bits, dammit! Oh, the humanity....


      • #4
        keep it short, sweet and to the point - instead of sounding like a pretentious wanker.

        Tell them what is wrong.
        Tell them why it is wrong.
        Tell them what to fix and suggest how.
        Tell the 'member' they are doing a good job, look forward to their response.


        • #5
          A pretentious wanker? Moi? I was hoping sounding like them might help


          • #6
            So put that in the letter.

            Para 1: I am concerned
            Para 2: I am concerned
            Para 3: I am concerned
            Para 4: Here is my personal experience
            Para 5: Here is my opinion
            Para 6: I am concerned
            Para 7: Here is my opinion
            Para 8: Here is my opinion
            Para 9: Here is my opinion

            Conclusion: ratepayer and taxpayer has concerns, experiences and opinions. So what?
            Originally posted by Melkor
            The Saint is all over the answer like a Saint on a cupcake.


            • #7
              I fixed it for you

              To my dearest and most loved Russel,

              It has come to my attention that there has been a dangerous situation created on the roads in the Melville area through the addition of roadside furniture and unrestrained foliage growth along Karel Ave. The growth of vegetation restricts the view of vehicle users and creates a potential traffic hazard due to restricted vision of traffic in the intersection. (Please see attached diagram for location)

              This intersection has suffered from several incidents in the past which may be related:

              cite incidents

              I recommend that Melville council trim the foliage at regular intervals to ensure this is not a hazard, as local residents and drivers have begun to recognise the danger and trim the council foliage themselves; a situation which is not acceptable.

              Your work has been totally rad so far, I trust you will see to it that the foliage is trimmed as soon as possible and monitored/maintained further in order to mitigate the risk to road users in the Melville area and remove any chance of the council being found liable for any injuries sustained. (the money shot)

              Also, what the fuck is up with putting solid objects near the road, its not like cars and bikes are meant to stay on the road all the time...

              Yours sexily,



              • #8
                Mmm...back to the drawing board, eh? What about the redneck version as provided by The Universal Translator!

                Ah am writin' tuh y'all concerned about thar dang numbuh uv dangerous obstacles bein' permanently erected on roads 'n Melville, hot damn! Ah re-fuh tuh thar dang burgeonin' numbuh uv concrete 'n brick median strips, sproutin' trees, which seem currently 'n vogue, pardner. Although Ah kin appreciate how some secshuns uv thar dang community may view these artefacts as elements uv suburban gentrificashun, 'n maw opinion...


      , I think I need some sleep...